And Then God Said "Straighten Up Down There!"

Thank you, God, for THE RAIN!!!

A storm burst out in Central Texas tonight!!! (YES, I AM blogging about THE WEATHER.) After I-can't-remember-how-long, the nigh-unbearable heat was finally broken up by a thunder storm for the record books! (Probably... maybe not... but it was quite a storm!) I strolled outside the station for a smoke break, and it DID NOT stop thundering for the entire 5 or so minutes!!! It smelled like an elecrtical fire out there! I'm talking 5 minutes of continual thunder and enough lightening to power a small continent!

And I'm stuck in the TV station, which is a very exciting place to be during any meterological event. The TV signal gets fuzzy, then we take a power hit, then the lights come back on and these weather alerts start clicking out rolls of paper while a robotic voice drones on about what sort of warning we're under and what counties are affected and for how long. And there are weather crawls that I have to key onto the screen while engineers are running around re-starting equipment and fixing the crawl-keyers, which it turns out don't work like they're supposed to, only we didn't know because the weather for the last 2 months has been uniformly Oppressively Hot. Then the power goes out again, for a full 11 seconds.

I should explain that 11 seconds in TV Time is much, MUCH longer than eleven seconds in Real World Time. 2 seconds is an eternity in TV Time! In 2 seconds you can lose your signal, identify the problem and press a button to bypass the problem and get the signal back on the air before the viewers at home have a chance to even think about picking up their phones to call and complain.

Count it out with me:

One Mississippi, two Mississippi.

In that long a problem can happen and be fixed.

In TV Time.

There are 24 frames in a single second of film, 30 frames in a single second of video. (Most TV shows are shot on film and transfered to video.) If you hold an image for 2 frames, it's long enough for the eye to transmit a message to the brain that it has seen something different than what it was looking at, and for the brain to form a rough picture of that image and show it to you. In 2 seconds the brain can process a great deal of information.

If you're watching your TV and the screen goes black, it'll take 5 seconds before you begin to really worry that there's something wrong. (Watch some TV for a couple of hours and try to count how much black you see on the air. My guess is that unless you're watching PBS, you won't see more than HALF A SECOND -- One missi... -- of black during any random 2-hour block.)

However, if you're watching TV and you do see 5 seconds of black, EVERY SECOND AFTER THAT is ETERNAL.

So when we lose signal for more than 5 seconds, it feels like we're in black forever! And as a Master Control Operator my job is to stay the hell OUT of black!

Still, Acts of God are the excusable exception, and of course, we don't get in trouble for them. But we're wired to panic when TV viewers aren't looking at what they're supposed to be looking at, so even though we can't fix that particular problem (we have a back-up power generator that takes care of that for us, natch) we're still programmed to panic over every passing second.

Blah.

You probably didn't log on to read about what my job is like during a storm, but all that it to illustrate what a HUGE even this thunder storm was for me tonight!!! (Besides, it's my blog! You think it's boring? Stop reading! Have I mentioned that Kevin Smith's blog is really badass? It's at www.silentbobspeaks.com.)

IT was COOL!!!

OH! And that's not even the most exciting news!!! TISHA IS IN TOWN!!!

Actually, she's in Georgetown. But in Central Texas, it all feels like Austin. (Similar to L.A. and NYC in that way.) You're half an hour away from anywhere.

And I'm working tomorrow, but SHE'S GONNA GO SEE WAR OF THE WORLDS WITH ME SATURDAY!!!

First, I get to hang with Tisha!!! Then on top of that, I'm finally gonna see WAR OF THE WORLDS!!!

Life can be so gratifying at times!

Not much else to say, really. One of the main reasons I'm making this entry is to shove that stupid prank entry closer to the bottom!

I didn't tell you: So Tommy leaves me a voice message Monday, just thanking Brian and me so much for keeping an eye on their house and the animals, and I get The Guilt so I have to call him back and tell him that the prank entry is just a joke!

Am I a WUSS or what?!!

But he's all "Dude, we appreciate it so much, and just thank you guys" and I cave!

You know what I'm waiting for, though? For Tommy to sort of chuckle and say "You know I read you're blog! That's why I left that message, cause I knew it would kill you." And then he'll point and laugh! And then my entire Fifth Grade class will materialize out of nowhere and point and laugh at me, and then I'll look down and see that I'm only wearing my underwear, and then Mrs. Wallce will pop up behind me a pointedly inquire why I haven't turned in my test yet, and inform me that it's three hour late, and then...

No wait. I guess I'm not really afraid ALL that will happen.

But I wouldn't be surprised if Tommy told me he had read the blog before he left me that really sweet message. You didn't hear his voice. Surely he wasn't THAT appreciative! (Or was he? I'm a worm!)

Hey, on a serious note: I seriosuly doubt anyone who doesn't know me is reading this blog at this point, but England got hit today. 5 coordinated bombings in London. I heard about it on BBC4 as I was making breakfast, and it shook me up. I get how they must have felt 4 years ago on September 1st, being an ocean away but wanting to help. If anyone in England -- or who has loved ones there -- should happen to stumble upon my stupid little blog, please know that my prayers are for you tonight!!! And my love! And my deepest, sincerest concern and well wishes! Britan and the British have withstood far, far worse than this cowardly terrorist-shit, but I still wish you love and strength as you all recover!!!

As pathetic as this outpouring of sympathy is in the midst of a spewing of trivial guff from an insignificant little man in Texas, this blog is about my life and what affects me. And what happened in London today affected me.

God bless this pittiful little planet, even as we try to wrend ourselves apart!